No Love from the Grocer
In line at the grocery checkout last night the male cashier was shamelessly flirting with the guy in front of me. “Are you a gardener? You look like you work outdoors. All tan and rugged.” And so forth. Also, when he said “rugged” he shivered a little, like rugged evokes snuggling up in a fur coat or putting on pants that just came out of the dryer.
Meanwhile I’ve just gotten off my bike, I’m all sweaty and tan (do I even have to mention the golden tendrils of my silken, sun-bleached hair?) and gearing up for the inevitable flirting I’m about to receive, but no! The guy just bags my groceries like he’s being timed and gives me one of those resigned half-frowns like it must be tough appearing in public with a face like mine.
What the heck? I had half a mind to protest the store’s clearly prejudiced cashier flirting policy, but that likely would have resulted in my third forced eviction from that particular natural foods grocery. Once for “violently” (their words) returning a “cake” (my words — sesame is not a valid sugar substitute) and once for having a disagreement with a different cashier regarding their fatuous carding policy (which ended with me pumping my fist in the air and chanting “Attica!” over and over).
Aaron, are you a web designer? You look like you work indoors. All tan and able to perform CSS mastery.
I shivered when I typed “perform CSS mastery.”
Comment by Jim Renaud — October 14, 2005 @ 4:31 am
Maybe it wasn’t a “it must be tough appearing in public with a face like [yours]” kind of half-frown. Maybe it was a “isn’t it crap that it’s in my contract that I have I have to flirt with at least seven guys an hour to earn my shitty wage, thank god that was the last one this hour. I’m not even gay for God’s sake” kind of half-frown. ‘Cos I’ve heard that how it is. Especially in the natural-food places.
Comment by Pierce — October 14, 2005 @ 7:12 am
This is precisely why I prefer to do most of my shopping at the 7 Day corner market. Sure the food’s even more overpriced than Nature’s, but the cashier is always just straight-up, no frills, look-you-dead-in-the-eye let’s get our crap done. No flirting with anyone ever, not even joking around with drunk & high jerks who come in looking for pipes or porn.
Comment by Sloop — October 14, 2005 @ 7:28 am
Maybe he thought that you were way too out of his league… oh that could be punny.
Comment by Jim Renaud — October 14, 2005 @ 9:37 am